Freelance Corner: The Ghosting Problem

I've been wondering for a while about what content to write and was wondering about the type of content people wanted to read. Then, someone on Twitter pointed out that if I enjoy writing something, then people will enjoy reading it. As someone who reads a lot, I understand this but somehow didn't think it applied to my own writing… Anyway, this post is all about something I've wanted to write about for a while: ghosting. 

Let's jump right in.

Ghosting is more rampant than you think

Believe it or not, people seem to absolutely think it's okay to just ignore freelancers. Not all people and not all potential clients do this. Obviously, otherwise, we'd never have any work, but you'd be surprised how common this is. Or maybe you wouldn't, but just to clarify, this is a huge problem that I think needs to be highlighted.

I think it goes without saying that ghosting is, first and foremost, incredibly rude. It's unprofessional and totally disrespectful for the freelancer who has taken the time to chat with you about your needs. Believe it or not, when we're speaking with someone about a potential project, we're not getting paid. 

While most people are decent and will get back to say they're not going ahead with you for the project, there are others who just never reply. I consider it ghosting when 3 weeks have passed and my weekly follow-ups have been ignored. I'm not a sociopath, I don't follow up the day after. I leave it a week - generally - and then another week. Then, if nothing, I leave it and add it to the ghosting pile. 

How following up can help

I've been freelancing long enough now that I know when I'm being ghosted. I know my message hasn't gone to spam because you emailed me and therefore have my email address. I know you also have my phone number. But, I'm a stickler for professionalism (this ranty blog post aside), and I will follow up with you, to thank you for the time taken on the call. I do this because genuinely, I like meeting new people and chatting with them.

I also follow up because I give people the benefit of the doubt and work on the assumption that they're busy and/or have been chatting to multiple people and need some time to make a decision. Sometimes a little nudge helps jolt the memory or the decision-making process. I say this because sometimes I read an email on my phone, then forget to reply or mark it as unread, then come back to it when I'm tidying my inbox.

People are forgetful, we're also juggling many different things at the moment, and I know I'm not alone in feeling scatter-brained due to the pandemic that's been going on for almost 18 months. This is why I always follow up at least once, so people get the chance to reply.

Why I'm writing about this now

I think ghosting has become more prolific over the past year, and it makes sense that it did. But it doesn't mean that just because it's common means it's okay. In fact, the more it's done, the less okay it is. Someone said to me before that ghosting someone is like staring blankly at them while meeting face to face and just leaving the room. I know I certainly wouldn't do that.

Think of it that way: if your exchange was happening face-to-face, or was with someone you were going to see frequently, would you ignore them? The chances are you wouldn't because you'd be absolutely mortified to have to face them every day in the office/co-working space. 

In my mind, the same rules apply to video calls, which replaced face-to-face interactions for a huge amount of time over the last year and a bit. I'm also writing this now to highlight the fact that this problem exists, and that freelancers talk to each other. So if you're shopping around for quotes and ignoring everyone, we'll probably find out. 

———

In my experience, being nice and courteous goes a long, long way in this industry, on both sides. So, if you're sound and willing to reply to my email, even if my quote is outside your budget or you don't think we'd work well together, then feel free to contact me about your copy needs.